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When walking through a heavily thistled area, remember to hold your tummy in.
”- Sayings of Bear
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Bears do not mature, they just get old enough to have opinions.
”- Sayings of Bear
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If in doubt, sit down and grumble. It looks better if you keep your front legs folded.
”- Sayings of Bear
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A bear who sits and contemplates his dinner will soon find it stolen.
”- Sayings of Bear
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Being happy is normally the result of not having looked round the corner first.
”- Sayings of Bear
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Bears need fleas. They give them something to take vengence upon during long nights.
”- Sayings of Bear
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Being a bear is not more special than being anything else. It is somewhat furrier though.
”- Sayings of Bear
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Fish tastes very much the same whichever end of the beast you start from.
”- Sayings of Bear
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You really must ask yourself whether eating honey is worth the paw-ache of getting your fur all stuck up.
”- Sayings of Bear
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It doesn't mattter how dry the cave is to start with, it always seems damp when you wake.
”- Sayings of Bear
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I don’t kill for pleasure; I kill for food. Except I find food a pleasure. There are some problems destined to cause a bear indigestion.
”- Sayings of Bear
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A berry bush with thorns is just mean spirited
”- Sayings of Bear
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It is easy to assume that a bear's life is the very definition of liberation. Assumptions are simple when you are not caught in a freezing rainstorm.
”- Sayings of Bear
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Hungry bears don't make plans. They make for fast food outlets.
”- Sayings of Bear
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How fast can a bear climb a tree? Slower than he can fall out of one.
”- Sayings of Bear
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However interesting the life cycle of the salmon may be, don't forget that they are also good eating.
”- Sayings of Bear
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If you are worrying about where the next meal is coming from, you are not spending enough time hunting.
”- Sayings of Bear
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If in doubt - fish.
”- Sayings of Bear
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The best way to get dinner out of a bear is with a crowbar.
”- Sayings of Bear
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Actually, there is no "best" way of getting dinner out of a bear. Admitting defeat is the accepted reaction.
”- Sayings of Bear
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Bears are not for Christmas. Mostly because they are asleep and therefore boring.
”- Sayings of Bear
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However you drop a bear, it will always land on its behind. Mind you, bear dropping is seriously unrecommended!
”- Sayings of Bear
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You are never lonely when you have fleas.
”- Sayings of Bear
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The idea of a salmon farm would make even a grown bear faint. Though not for long.
”- Sayings of Bear
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Don't mistake fluffy and cuddly for hungry and dangerous - however similar they may seem.
”- Sayings of Bear
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Before you chop down a tree, try sitting under it for a while. Trees are good for sitting under.
”- Sayings of Bear
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Don't sit under a tree that someone else is chopping down.
”- Sayings of Bear
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Cubs climb trees. Large old bears watch cubs climb trees. This should not be reversed. Take my word for it.
”- Sayings of Bear
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Before you count your pennies, make sure you actually have pockets.
”- Sayings of Bear
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The scientist that relies on statistics to predict probability is a slave to inaccuracy. Well, bears don't always think about fish!
”- Sayings of Bear
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Flying is not about volume but density. Bears don't fly - nothing personal.
”- Sayings of Bear
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Bears don't get god. She seems an unnecessary complication.
”- Sayings of Bear
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Armpits are important to bears. They stop their arms falling off. What, you should clean them too?
”- Sayings of Bear
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Bears are naturally loners for one good reason: greed
”- Sayings of Bear
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If bears didn't hibernate they would live twice as long as they think they do.
”- Sayings of Bear
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Bears should only be allowed to swim in the summer, so they can be hung out to dry and freshen up after. And you thought wet dog was bad!
”- Sayings of Bear
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Bears' claws don't retract, so they should stick to a tree when you throw them at it. Okay, who's stupid idea was this one?
”- Sayings of Bear
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Just because something is possible doesn't mean you should try it. Bears tend to bite people who throw them at trees.
”- Sayings of Bear
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You might think it is a nice walk in the woods. A bear thinks it is a delivery service. It is all a matter of perspective.
”- Saying of Bear
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Strange thing about bears. It doesn't matter how far away they are, when they stand up and look at you, it suddenly isn't far enough.
”- Sayings of Bear
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Courtesy is a step ladder left next to a commercial waste bin.
”- Sayings of Bear
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If you think bears are incapable of grinning, look at their faces when they realise your gun has just jammed.
”- Sayings of Bear
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